From tearaway teens to stroppy toddlers, Kathryn Mewes knows how to handle troublesome children. The author and childcare expert is back with a new series of the Three Day Nanny on Channel 4, helping stressed-out mums and dads see their parenting pitfalls.

This week she helped out struggling parents Luke and Laura and their troublesome toddlers Frankie and Willow.

1. Where did a three-year-old learn to curse like a sailor?

2. Hang on, is that child ACTUALLY called Willow? What an… interesting choice!

3. We can sort of see why there’s a problem here. This mum isn’t the most assertive person in the world.

4. Hang on, actually we feel sorry for her. Two naughty screaming kids must be a bit of a struggle.

5. Will Maurice the Uniform Bear get his own Channel 4 series very soon? We certainly hope so.

6. There’s a good reason our mums and dads (probably) didn’t practice the school run with us when we were kids. Because it’s just a bit mental.

7. Why didn’t we think of playing Three Day Nanny bingo?

8. No matter how awful your own naughty kids/younger siblings/nieces and nephews are, grab them right now and give them a cuddle. At least they’re not as bad as those nightmare children.

9. Anyone want to take bets on condom sales going up tomorrow?